A to Z Challenge, Music, Writing

Bat Out of Hell #AtoZChallenge

BOh my Holy God, I love this song so much. From the first time I heard it all trapped in my pre-adolescent shell of a body, the lyrics, the vocals, the keys, the strings, the drums, a cacophony of delight ah…the symphonic ecstasy of music.  And the imagery, sweet child of Music, a picture painted in a deluge of sound and brightly colored notes penetrating every spore of my being. I felt myself an angel escaping Hell on a roaring bike to force my way into Heaven.

 

Being ever so passionate and given to the dramatic ever since mortal flesh imprisoned me, I felt an angel born in Hell who could just make out the borders of paradise, forever out of reach. It was always that idea that fed my fantasy, that fallen one, a demon now but an angel in another time and place caught in Hell, forever separated from the light of Creation, guarding the gates of the dead and damned. A glance of something wondrous and a rebellion in Hell begins and then like a bat out of hell….oh how I wish I could make these words my own.

 

“Bat Out Of Hell”

Meatloaf, Lyrics Jim Steinman, Music by Todd Rundgren, 1977

The sirens are screaming and the fires are howling Way down in the valley tonight. There’s a man in the shadows with a gun in his eye And a blade shining, oh, so bright. There’s evil in the air and there’s thunder in sky, And a killer’s on the bloodshot streets. Oh, and down in the tunnel where the deadly are rising, Oh, I swear I saw a young boy down in the gutter, He was starting to foam in the heat.

Oh, baby, you’re the only thing in this whole world, That’s pure and good and right. And wherever you are and wherever you go, There’s always gonna be some light. But I gotta get out, I gotta break it out now, Before the final crack of dawn. So we gotta make the most of our one night together. When it’s over you know, We’ll both be so alone.

Like a bat out of hell I’ll be gone when the morning comes. When the night is over Like a bat out of hell I’ll be gone-gone-gone. Like a bat out of hell I’ll be gone when the morning comes. But when the day is done, and the sun goes down, And the moonlight’s shining through, Then like a sinner before the gates of heaven, I’ll come crawling on back to you.

I’m gonna hit the highway like a battering ram On a silver black phantom bike. When the metal is hot and the engine is hungry, And we’re all about to see the light. Nothing ever grows in this rotting old hole. And everything is stunted and lost. And nothing really rocks And nothing really rolls And nothing’s ever worth the cost.

And I know that I’m damned if I never get out, And maybe I’m damned if I do, But with every other beat I’ve got left in my heart, You know I’d rather be damned with you. Well, if I gotta be damned you know I wanna be damned Dancing through the night with you. Well, if I gotta be damned you know I wanna be damned— Gotta be damned, you know I wanna be damned— Gotta be damned, you know I wanna be damned Dancing through the night— Dancing through the night— Dancing through the night with you.

Oh, baby, you’re the only thing in this whole world, That’s pure and good and right. And wherever you are and wherever you go, There’s always gonna be some light. But I gotta get out, I gotta break it out now, Before the final crack of dawn. So we gotta make the most of our one night together. When it’s over you know We’ll both be so alone.

Like a bat out of hell I’ll be gone when the morning comes. When the night is over Like a bat out of hell I’ll be gone gone gone. Like a bat out of hell I’ll be gone when the morning comes. But when the day is done and the sun goes down, And the moonlight’s shining through, Then like a sinner before the gates of heaven, I’ll come crawling on back to you. Then like a sinner before the gates of heaven, I’ll come crawling on back to you.

I can see myself tearing up the road Faster than any other boy has ever gone. And my skin is raw but my soul is ripe. No one’s gonna stop me now, I’m gonna make my escape. But I can’t stop thinking of you, And I never see the sudden curve until it’s way too late. And I never see the sudden curve ’til it’s way too late.

Then I’m dying at the bottom of a pit in the blazing sun. Torn and twisted at the foot of a burning bike. And I think somebody somewhere must be tolling a bell. And the last thing I see is my heart Still beating, Breaking out of my body and flying away, Like a bat out of hell. Then I’m dying at the bottom of a pit in the blazing sun. Torn and twisted at the foot of a burning bike.

And I think somebody somewhere must be tolling a bell. And the last thing I see is my heart Still beating, still beating, Breaking out of my body and flying away, Like a bat out of hell. Like a bat out of hell. Like a bat out of hell. Oh, like a bat out of hell! Like a bat out of hell! Like a bat out of hell!

 

A to Z Challenge, Blogging, Music, Writing

A to Z Challenge Reveal #AtoZChallenge

thmrevelLast year, I had a blast doing the A to Z blogging challenge. My theme last year was beer. I had a beer for every letter and wrote a short story around it.

This year my theme will be music. Each day I will feature a song beginning with the appropriate letter and write a little short story inspired by the song.

Music has always been a big driver of mine, and great songwriters are also great story tellers and great poets. I made this argument with my high school English teacher thirty years ago. She disagreed. Too bad she passed away before Bob Dylan won the Nobel Prize in literature, huh? So I hope all of you participating have as much fun as I do.

Dreams, Mothers and Daughters, Music, Parenting, Women, Writing

There Goes My Life

IMG_0601I remember my daughter’s first steps, her first words, the first book she read all by herself, her first day of school, the first movie she loved, her first crush, her first heart break, the day my best friend and I dropped her off at college, all of it a tapestry of memories, forever playing notes in my soul. One of those country songs waiting to happen.

Atlantis 011I no longer recall the pain that came with the struggles of raising a daughter on my own, the exhaustion, the stress of trying to provide a good life for the two of us. I know at times it was very hard, but from the moment I held my daughter the first time, all regret was gone. Even though, I had no business having a child when I did, a child I knew I would have to raise on my own.

My story is not that unusual. Wendell Mobley and Neil Thurber wrote about my life for Kenny Chesney to sing about way back in 2003 when Kate was only ten years old. It told the story of young man getting his girlfriend pregnant, giving up his dreams, and staying to raise a child and finding love and delight in his decision.

That was not quite my story.  There was no young man in my life. It was just me, immature, unsure of what I wanted, not settled, dead broke, and pregnant before my life even began. So I saw myself in that song, but only as far as the second verse. Yeah, I loved my little girl and there was nothing I would trade her for. Then the years rolled by.

KateandStuff 028My daughter went to the University of Georgia for college, just down the road a spell from where I lived. She had been accepted at schools as far away as California, but decided to stay close for a short while longer. And so I thought she would remain tied to the South, to home.

After all, I had dreams too that fell away over the years, dreams of living in the UK, living as a gypsy traversing the world with nothing but a backpack and pen and paper for writing. Perhaps, I was not so brave as my daughter. Perhaps, that mistake I thought I made simply spawned new dreams.

Friday morning, March 10, 2017, my life got up before dawn and drove away. My daughter, Kate, moved to Brooklyn, New York. To stay. This is how things are meant to be. I know that. I am so proud of my little girl. Still, who knew things would go so fast? The lyrics of that old song changed to strip my life bare and left me bleeding. There goes my life.

AutumnSkyAll she could think about was I’m too young for this. Got my whole life ahead. Hell I’m just a kid myself. How’m I gonna raise one?

All she could see were her dreams goin’ up in smoke. So much for ditchin’ this town and hangin’ out on the coast. Oh well, those plans are long gone.

And she said, There goes my life. There goes my future, my everything. Might as well kiss it all good-bye. There goes my life…….

IMG_0600A couple years of up all night and a few thousand diapers later. That mistake she thought she made covers up the refrigerator. Oh yeah……….she loves that little girl.

IMG_0598Momma’s waiting to tuck her in, As she fumbles up those stairs. She smiles back at her dragging that teddy bear. Sleep tight, big eyes and bouncin’ curls.

She smiles….. There goes my life. There goes my future, my everything. I love you, mommy good-night. There goes my life.

 

img_0381She had that Honda loaded down. With Abercrombie clothes and 15 pairs of shoes and her American Express. She checked the oil and slammed the hood, said you’re good to go. She hugged her tight and headed up the East Coast.

And she cried, There goes my life. There goes my future, my everything. I love you. Baby good-bye.

 

IMG_0589There goes my life. There goes my life.

Baby good-bye.